Confessions, Husband, Letters to My Kids, Marriage, Ministry

My Pastor-Husband

Dear Child,

Here’s a confession: it’s a little bit strange to have your pastor also be your husband. Or have your husband also be your pastor. I’m sure you’re going to have an interesting life ahead of you has a PK – pastor’s kid. (Hey, that’s funny…PK is also what your dad often goes by…short for Pastor Kevin.)

In the first year or two of this ministerial process, there were Sundays when I sat in the front row and verbally corrected my pastor-husband if he misquoted a reference or something. I am totally ashamed of these moments. I can’t even believe I’m telling you this, other than to pray you’ll learn from my errors.

After learning the art of respect keeping my mouth shut, I proceeded to wonder what it would be like to listen to my husband preach each week.

I’ve had to learn how to sit all by myself in that front row, missing his arm around my shoulder. It’s like we play “tag” on Sunday mornings – I’m on stage, leading worship and praying, and as I go sit down he moves from his lonely spot in the front row to his place behind the pulpit. (Thanks for the warming the pew for me, Dear. Seriously. I was really cold last Sunday and it was just a little warm from your residual body heat.)

Child, I’m so pleased to tell you the truth of the matter. I have a pastor and he happens to be my husband. He is an outstanding shepherd of God’s people, caring for and corralling my heart along with the rest of the congregation’s. He wears many hats in our relationship. There are some times we have to have business meetings with the intent of discussing church stuff. There are times when I seek his counsel and wisdom, his critic and rebuke as a parishioner to her pastor. There are times I just need him to wear his husband hat and be with me, listening, holding my hand. In all my wondering of what this life would be like, I never anticipated my husband-who-is-a-pastor would also become my pastor.

What a gift.

Following this reflection on life as a full time ministry couple are photos documenting Kevin’s ordination ceremony. It was a moving occasion, a true commissioning. I’m so thankful to be standing at his side.




Kevin’s family made the long trip from Michigan to participate in the service. (L-R: Yvonne and Ralph Eccles, Melanie and Kevin, Gordon, Linda and Brian, Wanda and Mert Arvidson)


The Elders of the Genesis Conference of the Free Methodist Church laying hands on Kevin as he is ordained


Bishop David Roller presided over the ordination


Bishop David and Yvonne Roller – friends from Kevin’s growing-up days in Spring Arbor, to his ordination


Rev. KM Eccles – a nod of respect to Kevin’s great grandpa Kenneth Merrill Walton who went by “KM” and was an ordained minister in the FMC


This certificate beautifully explains the office of Elder to which Kevin has been set apart




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